What the #@$%! Happened to Our Manners at Work?
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What the #@$%! Happened to Our Manners at Work?

Because of pandemic rust, a generational shift or something else, the working world is getting ruder, many say.

By CALLUM BORCHERS
Mon, Sep 12, 2022 10:20amGrey Clock 4 min

Workers, where are your bleeping manners?

You’re cursing more and handshaking less, quitting on shorter notice and waiting longer to answer emails and texts.

At least, that’s how it feels to the self-appointed etiquette police among your co-workers and business associates. Politeness is tough to measure, and, sure, certain norms are overdue for updates. Still, I keep hearing from business people who swear (as in attest, not cuss) that the working world is getting ruder.

Hiring managers lament that job candidates skip cover letters whenever possible, seldom follow up on interviews with thank-you notes and can’t be counted on to show up once they’ve accepted offers.

Job seekers, for their part, complain that computers screen those cover letters, anyway, and that too few recruiters are considerate enough to send rejection letters, leaving hopefuls to wonder for weeks about where they stand with potential employers.

Many workers, particularly younger ones, claim they aren’t interested in bonding with colleagues and act accordingly. Happy hour? Hard pass. That’s not so much about being cold or uncivil, these people say, as it is about maintaining a private life away from work.

Others’ interpersonal skills are rusty or underdeveloped, owing to limited opportunities to practice during much of the past couple of years.

One glimmer of hope, or a sign of self-awareness: LinkedIn reports August enrollment in its two most popular business etiquette courses was up 127% year over year.

Those mourning the supposed decline of business etiquette blame the pandemic, a tight labor market, Gen Z and the internet.

“In the last three or four years, it has become much, much worse,” says Steve Landrum, a sales executive who lives near Atlanta.

His No. 1 gripe is “ghosting” from potential clients, which he says is more common now than at any time in his 30-year career. Like a dating-app match who suddenly stops answering messages after flirting, some sales leads show initial interest only to cut off communication without explanation.

When that happens, Mr. Landrum sends a short “breakup” email—“I’m going to assume that you’ve gone in a different direction,” he writes—if only for his own sense of closure. He tells me those who aren’t courteous harm their own reputations, though he concedes that bad form doesn’t dog people as it once did.

The bigger shift in recent years might be that rudeness has become less costly.

Left your job abruptly? In this economy, there’s bound to be another one around the corner—for now, anyway—and companies aren’t checking references as often as they used to.

Underdressed for the big meeting? Let she who is without stretchy Zoom pants cast the first stone.

Ignored that question a co-worker asked you on Slack? In a hybrid workplace, you might never cross paths with the co-worker and have to suffer the awkward consequences. Or if you do, you can claim having turned off notifications accidentally.

Just don’t try that excuse on Phoenix Normand, chief of staff at a tech company in California.

“Waiting all day to return a Slack inquiry is pretty much the most disrespectful thing you can do,” he says.

A close second: mucking up written communications with wayward punctuation, misspellings, abbreviations and emojis. If Mr. Normand sees a “your” that should be “you’re,” he’s gonna be, like, WTF? Amirite?

“The English language is being butchered to the point where it’s almost embarrassing,” he says.

He adds that workers often don’t realize their informality can land poorly, at least if someone like the 53-year-old Mr. Normand is on the receiving end. A recipient might conclude that the writer doesn’t know basic grammar and syntax or take offence. A sloppy email can inadvertently suggest that the person in the “to” field isn’t worth the time it takes to proofread.

Toni Purvis, founder of the School of Disruptive Etiquette in Washington, D.C., recommends erring on the side of formality in writing. It can be safer, she says, to buck traditional notions of “professional” appearance because many companies have come to realize that rules governing attire, hair, tattoos and other aspects of personal style can marginaliae certain workers.

Still, it remains important to consider how others perceive the way you present yourself, she adds.

For instance, the red suit that Ms. Purvis wore on her first day as an intern at an investment bank in the aughts sent the wrong message. In an industry with its own dull palette—banker grey—it looked as though she was trying to be the centre of attention, she says.

The outfit was a hand-me-down, and Ms. Purvis was oblivious to the unofficial dress code because she was the first person in her family or circle of friends to enter the corporate world. Her school aims to help others who don’t grow up learning etiquette by osmosis avoid missteps.

Daniel Post Senning, author and spokesman at the Emily Post Institute, notes that many traditional standards can be traced to wealthy, white society in the Northeast. He agrees with Ms. Purvis that contemporary etiquette is evolving to be more inclusive.

“Being true to who you are and where you came from is an important part of being honest,” he says.

That doesn’t mean authenticity always goes over well.

Cole Wiser, the creative director at a marketing agency in Dallas, says addressing a client as “y’all” once prompted a private scolding by a manager who thought the term was too informal. Ever since, Mr. Wiser says, he’s been self-conscious about a contraction that’s just part of how he talks.

When he slipped a “y’all” into a video call with a client recently, he asked his LinkedIn network to weigh in. The advice ranged from use it to don’t use it, to use it only with fellow Texans. “Read the room” was a popular tip.

The mixed feedback wasn’t especially helpful, but he posted thank-yous, anyway. It seemed like the proper thing to do.

Reprinted by permission of The Wall Street Journal, Copyright 2021 Dow Jones & Company. Inc. All Rights Reserved Worldwide. Original date of publication: September 8, 2022.



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Things I miss about my local gas station:

That’s it. That’s the list. OK, fine, I did enjoy the communal squeegees.

This week marks six months since the grand opening of my home electric-vehicle charging station. Congrats to the whole team! (Me and my electrician.) Located between my garage door and recycling bin, it’s hard to beat for the convenience. And also the price.

If you’ve followed my ad-EV-ntures, you’re aware of my feelings about the hell that is public EV charging , at least before Tesla started sharing its Superchargers with its rivals. Truth is, I rarely go to those public spots. The vast majority of EV owners—83%—regularly charge at home, according to data-analytics company J.D. Power.

I already discovered many EV virtues , but I didn’t quite grasp the cost savings until I tallied up half a year of home-charging data. In that time, I spent roughly $125 on electricity to drive just under 2,500 miles. In my old car, that would have cost me more than twice as much—assuming gas held steady at around $3.25 a gallon . And I was charging through the winter, when electricity doesn’t stretch as far in an EV.

Rebates and programs from my state and utility company sweeten the deal. So I will be able to take advantage of discounted electricity, and offset the cost of my charger. The same may be available to you.

But first, there are technical things to figure out. A 240-volt plug? Kilowatt-hours? Peak and off-peak charging? While other people are in their garages founding world-altering tech companies or hit rock bands, I’m in there finding answers to your home-charging questions.

How to get set up

Sure, you can plug your car into a regular 120-volt wall outlet. (Some cars come with a cable.) And sure, you can also simultaneously watch all of Netflix while it charges. It would take more than two days to fill my Ford Mustang Mach-E’s 290-mile battery via standard plug, known as Level 1 charging.

That’s why you want Level 2, which can charge you up overnight. It requires two components:

• A 240-volt electric outlet. Good news: You might already have one of these higher-powered outlets in your house. Some laundry dryers and other appliances require them. Bad news: It might not be in your garage—assuming you even have a garage. I realise not everybody does.

Since my suburban New Jersey home has an attached garage, the install process wasn’t horrible—or at least that’s what my electrician said. He ran a wire from the breaker panel in the basement to the garage and installed a new box with a NEMA 14-50 outlet. People with older homes or detached garages might face trickier wiring issues—more of a “Finding NEMA” adventure. (I apologise to everyone for that joke.)

My installation cost about $1,000 but the pricing can vary widely.

• A smart charger. Choosing a wall charger for your car is not like choosing one for your phone. These mini computers help you control when to start and stop charging, calculate pricing and more.

“This is not something where you just go to Amazon and sort for lowest to highest price,” said Tom Moloughney, the biggest EV-charging nerd I know. On his website and “State of Charge” YouTube channel , Moloughney has reviewed over 100 home chargers. In addition to technical measurements, he does things like freezing the cords, to see if they can withstand wintry conditions.

“Imagine you are fighting with this frozen garden hose every time you want to charge,” he said.

One of his top picks, the ChargePoint Home Flex , was the same one my dad had bought. So I shelled out about $550 for it.

Just remember, if you want to make use of a charger’s advanced features—remote controls, charging updates, etc.—you’ll also need strong Wi-Fi in your garage.

How to save money

I hear all you money-minded WSJ readers: That’s at least $1,600 after getting the car. How the heck is this saving money? I assumed I’d recoup the charging-equipment investment over time, but then I found ways to get cash back even sooner.

My utility provider, PSE&G, says it will cover up to $1,500 on eligible home-charger installation costs . I just need to submit some paperwork for the rebate. In addition, New Jersey offers a $250 rebate on eligible charger purchases. (Phew! My ChargePoint is on the list.) If all is approved, I’d get back around $1,250. Fingers crossed!

I didn’t know about these programs until I started reporting on this. Nearly half of home-charging EV owners say they, too, are unaware of the programs offered by their electric utility, according to a 2024 study released by J.D. Power . So yes, it’s good to check with your provider. Kelley Blue Book also offers a handy state-by-state breakdown.

How to charge

Now I just plug in, right? Kinda. Even if you have a Level 2 charger, factors affect how many hours a fill-up will take, from the amperage in the wall to the current charge of your battery. Take Lionel Richie’s advice and plan on charging all night long .

It can also save you money to charge during off-peak hours.

Electricity costs are measured in kilowatt-hours. On my basic residential plan, PSE&G charges 18 cents per kWh—just 2 cents above the 2023 national average . My Mustang Mach-E’s 290-mile extended-range battery holds 91 kilowatt-hours.

Translation: A “full tank” costs $16. For most gas-powered cars, that wouldn’t cover half a tank.

And If I’m approved for PSE&G’s residential smart-charging plan, my off-peak charging (10 p.m. to 6 a.m. and weekends) will be discounted by up to 10.5 cents/kWh that I’ll get as a credit the following month. I can set specific charging times in the ChargePoint app.

Electricity prices fluctuate state to state but every expert I spoke to said no matter where in the country you live, home charging should cost less than half what gas would for the same mileage. (See chart above for a cost comparison of electric versus gas.) And as I’ve previously explained , fast charging at public stations will cost much more.

One big question: Am I actually doing anything for the environment if I’m just taxing the grid? Eventually, I’d like to offset the grid dependence—and cost—by powering my fancy little station with solar panels. Then, I’ll just be missing the squeegee.

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